Using different life coaching exercises is a great way to get your clients to access their current life situation and to get to know themselves on a deeper level. What I love most about having a toolbox of strategies and tools as a coach is it helps you to facilitate powerful transformations with your clients. For example, if you have a client presenting with something concerning but you have the five whys technique, you can actually get below the surface and actually see what it is that's really bothering them and address that at a foundational level instead of what they think is in the way.

Having different life coaching tools provides your clients with resourceful steps that help them to bridge the gaps from where they are to where it is they want to be, and it allows them to effectively move forward. So today, what we're going to do is we're going to dive deep and talk about my favorite life coaching techniques and tools so that you can build a comprehensive toolbox of strategies that help you to support your clients at facilitating change that happens faster, goes deeper, and lasts longer.

The Miracle Question

 

The first coaching technique that I love to use is a miracle question. Now, if you're not familiar with the miracle question, the miracle question is based from solution focused therapy. So I learned this in grad school and loved it so much. But essentially, what you're doing as a coach is helping your client to imagine a circumstance or situation where all of their problems were removed and all of their issues were addressed.

 

So, for example, you may pose a question of the like, so suppose tonight, while you slept, a miracle happened, and tomorrow, when you wake up, all of your problems were removed and you were just at peace? Tell me some of the things that you noticed in life that suddenly got better. The miracle question helps the client to move out of the problem and the problem way of thinking into the solution that it is that they want to create. Also, as a coach, it supports you at knowing exactly what it is that your client is wanting.

From this coaching session in NLP, there's this concept of a way and toward motivated, and I talk a lot about this inside the Elevate Method Coaching Certification Program and away motivated and toward motivated is all about are we moving toward what we want or away from what we want? And depending upon what we're doing, we're actually magnetizing ourselves in the direction. Right? So it may be like, I want to get away from my soul sucking 9-5. But actually, the more that you say this, the more you actually draw yourself back into it versus saying, I want to have an impactful coaching business that lights me up, then you're being drawn toward what it is you want. What makes the miracle questions so amazing is that it catapults the client into being toward motivated and actually attracting what it is that they desire.

The second coaching technique is the GROW Model, which is a profound coaching model that actually supports you at supporting your clients, at setting goals and solving problems that are preventing them from reaching their goals. Grow is actually an acronym which stands for

Goal

Reality

Options/Opportunities and

the Way Forward.

So the G stands for goal. So what is the client's objective?

What is the goal that they're wanting to bring to fruition? The R is Reality, understanding exactly where the client is. Because if you don't know where they're at, you don't even know the steps to take to get them to where they want to be. Just imagine driving somewhere but not understanding your starting location. Then we have the O, which is Options.

 

So what you're going to consider is the options that you may pursue to w way forward, to move in the direction of where it is that you want to go, the options that are going to move the needle. I love the Grow model so much because the Grow model essentially helps you to identify the gaps. You understand where the client is, you understand where the client wants to be, and then you help to bridge that gap together.

Digging Deep

The third coaching technique that I want to talk about is what I identify as digging deep, but it's also known as the Five Whys, and this was a popular problem solving coaching tool that was developed back in the 1930s. So essentially, when a client presents to you with a concern or with a problem of something that they want to accomplish or something they haven't accomplished, you're going to use the Five Whys to really get to the root of that.

 

So, for example, if a client presents and says, I want to become healthy, asking a series of the why questions will actually help you to uncover what's at the root of that. Maybe it's really because they want to become accepted.

So this would look like, I want to become healthy.

Why?

Because I want to be able to be active

 

Why?

Because I want to be able to go to my ten year reunion and look good.

Why? Because I want people to know that I am not lazy and see that I didn't gain all this weight.

Why?

 

Because people always judged me

Why? Because I just want someone to accept me the way that I am now.

Got it!

With this activity as a coach you’re able to understand what's at the root of the problem, and then as a coach, you can actually address that instead of the presenting issue.

3 D’s For Productivity

The next strategy I have is my productivity assessment, which I call the Three DS- which stands for delete, delegate and do.

 

So a lot of times clients will come to me and they'll say, like, I really want to accomplish writing a book, I really want to build my business, or I really want to do whatever, but I just don't have time. How many people have heard of that, right? And when they present with that, I always let them know that we make time for what matters. In fact, I read recently that the average American wastes over two 9 hours. And this may look like scrolling social media or watching Netflix or Hulu Mindlessly because we're wasting approximately about 2 hours per day.

 

That means we also have time that we could feed back into our goals and actually have a strategy to be able to reach them. And so I use the 3D process to actually support my clients at reaching their goals. Let me break it down first. I always start with explaining the difference between busyness and productivity because we often equate the two and productivity is actually producing something. Whereas busyness may just be that you're moving but you may have nothing to show for it and no one wants that.

 

So what I have my clients do is I have them track how they're spending their time, let's say over a period of a week and then they bring it to our next session. When they bring it to our next session, we then color coordinate and organize the things into three different areas, the things that should be deleted, meaning they don't need to be on our schedule to begin with at all, the things that could be delegated. So what could we ask for support with? Maybe we could ask our spouse to cook for us or we could coordinate with a family friend to take our kids to their extracurriculars and we do the pick up vice versa and then the things that we need to do. So the things that we need to do are the things that we can only do.

 

So the way that this looks for me, I'll give you a very tangible example is I delete TV time out of my calendar. Now, I don't delete it in total, but I give myself an allotted amount of time per week that I can watch some of my favorite TV shows because I'm not a huge TV person, right? I delegate where necessary. So for example, one of the things that I do is with Girl scouts I rotate weeks. So one week I take my daughter and her friend and then next week her mom takes my daughter and her friend and then that's an example of the way in which I delegate.

 

And then the things that I need to do are the things that only I can do. So for example, only I can go live on YouTube or on social media for my business and so I make room for the things that only I can do. When you delete and delegate, you actually free up more space to do the things that matter, to do the things that move the needle. So when I'm using this with my client, I help them to delete and delegate accordingly, then help them to recognize how much free time they actually have and then fill that time with the things that are actually going to help them accomplish what it is that they want to work toward. The next strategy is visualization.

Visualization

Visualization is probably the most underutilized yet powerful tool that we have access to. The trouble is, visualization feels childish for a lot of people. It feels like something that we were supposed to do when we were young. We were supposed to use our imagination. But I challenge you as adults to let your imagination run wild.

 

Visualization is a tool that is used by famous people, wealthy people, even Olympic athletes. Because the reality is, if you can see it in your mind, you can hold it in your hand, you can bring it to your reality. And so with Visualization, what I allow my clients to do is I'll have them visualize what their success looks like. And what I like to do is I like them to visualize what it looks like right when it's about to happen. And what that brings up is it brings up all of their senses and it feels very real.

 

And the cool thing about our subconscious mind is it never wants to make you out to be a liar. So when it feels real, your subconscious mind goes to task to consider how it can actually be real. So what I often notice when working with my clients is as they're visualizing, they'll come up with such expansive or amazing ideas that help them to consider what are steps they can take now to actually bring their visualization to their reality. Sometimes with Visualization, I may let my client just visualize and bring in all of their senses so that it feels raw and real. And sometimes for me, what I'll do is I'll add in different metaphors or stories because stories and metaphors are so powerful and they're transformational tools, because what it helps your client to do is it helps your client to digest the metaphor or the story in an easy format.

 

They then can take that and apply that to their life. So it kind of breaks their hold on their problem and helps them to see it from a different perspective and then approach it and tackle it from that way.

Here is an example of one of my most raved about visualization meditations.

The 10 Second Rule

Another coaching technique that I created is what I call the ten second rule. And I love this one so much, especially when I'm working with women who have guilted themselves into feeling like what they want is too much, what they're asking for is too big. And so what I'll have them do is I'll have them ground themselves in the ear in the moment.

And then I'll ask them if nothing was in the way, there were no rules and restrictions and no one could hear what you were thinking, what is it that you would want? And I count to maybe five or ten, and then I stop them in that moment and I say, okay, that's exactly what it is that you want. What I highlight with that is that what it is that they want and what it is that they've convinced themselves that they want is actually the gap showing up in their life, causing them to feel unfulfilled.

And so what we'll start to explore is why they've convinced themselves that they can't have it and what they need to believe to actually show themselves that it's possible. This is a great strategy to use in the early stages of coaching so that you also know what is the purpose and what it is that you're focused on moving forward.

EFT aka Tapping

The next strategy I love to leverage is EFT tapping. And if you've been following me for any amount of time, you know I love all things emotional freedom techniques. So EFT is an amazing modality and it helps you to align and balance your energy. And the way EFT works is you move through different meridian points on your body and what it does is it helps to calm you, ground you and regulate your nervous system. The cool thing with EFT is you can literally use it for whatever.

 

So if you have a client presenting with anxiety, you could use it. If you have a client presenting with fear around, maybe going live online, you could use it. If you have a client presenting with some physical pain, such as like a headache, other like you can use this a lot of times.

Most recently, I have helped clients use EFT to increase productivity and EFT to attract abundance.

With EFT, I will help my clients learn how to use it so that they can literally take healing back into their own hands and in between sessions, leverage it. If you ever want to learn about how to become certified in EFT, definitely check out the Elevate method where I teach the science behind it as well as the applicability to really help you to facilitate amazing transformations.

SWOT ANALYSIS

The next strategy I use is a SWOT analysis. Now, you may be very familiar with a swap analysis from a business standpoint. Many people use that in that way because they want to see what are their competitors doing and what can they do to stand out, that sort of thing. But I actually love using a SWOT analysis for a personal assessment and life coaching. Let me explain.

 

So SWOT is an acronym that stands for strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats. So I love using this for a personal assessment because first you can identify your strengths. We don't spend enough time staying in our zone of genius because most of the time we don't know it. Then we have weaknesses where we can often beat ourselves up. But I flip this and I help my clients to identify the way in which their weaknesses may serve them.

 

We then move into opportunities. So what opportunities do you have? What opportunities can you respond to? What opportunities can you create? And then we identify threats.

 

So I look at threats such as the barriers or the blocks that are preventing you from getting to where you want to be. And the reason that I like to know those is because when we understand what our barriers or blocks are, we can learn to circumvent them and move around them to actually move toward what it is that we want. I love the SWOT Analysis tool because it's a useful tool to help you to make improvements and to help you to stay forward focused and keep your goals on track.

You can check out my video on the SWOT Analysis here!

The Work

The Work is by Byron Katie, which I absolutely love because it's breaking down your version of the truth. So when I have a client presenting with a limiting belief, I love to leverage this tool.

 

So you go through a series of four questions. You ask the client who is presenting with a limiting belief….

Is this absolutely true? You then give them some time to really reflect on if this is true.

Then you ask, can you know that it's true?

How do you feel? Or how do you react with believing that thought?

Who would you be without that thought?

I love this so much because it helps your clients to see that a lot of what we feel isn't always the truth, isn't always our reality. And if we release ourselves from that belief, we actually free ourselves up to believe the things that serve our success.

The Empty Chair Technique

The next strategy is the empty Chair technique. And you may have heard of this technique or you may be new to it, but I love it so much because it's based on Gestalt therapy and I learned this in grad school. So it's actually a counseling technique that I have now weaved into my coaching practice. And I love it so much because it helps you to connect with your environment and your relationships and your different experiences. Also, leveraging this tool actually helps you to work through interpersonal as well as internal conflict.

 

And it helps you to see your situation from different perspectives. So let me explain how it works. So if a client comes to you and maybe they're struggling with forgiveness towards an expelled. Or they're struggling with understanding why someone made a choice that affected them or whatever it may be. You essentially have them sit in a chair and face another empty chair and you give them the confidence.

 

You give them the security to really express what's coming up for them and talk about what they're feeling. Now, this is where it gets fun. After they've expressed their thoughts and their feelings about the situation, they actually switch to the opposite chair and they speak from that perspective, that other person's perspective. This is what actually helps them to see things from both sides. With this, your client can continue to move back and forth between both chairs, really coming to a solution, really coming to an understanding, really coming to a place of completion, through the different dialogue back and forth.

 

And then you as a coach can support them as they're going back and forth with that dialogue.

The Route

I love this strategy so much because it helps your client to take responsibility for where they're at and feel empowered to change directions.

If you could elevate yourself to feel empowered with one simple formula, how would that feel?

Being at cause in your life is a fool proof formula for getting there. So, when you live at cause for the things that happen in your life, both positive and not so positive, it sounds like this:

“Yes! Everything I experience in life is the sum total of all of my conscious and subconscious beliefs and decisions. I create who I am, what I do, and what I have. And I have the ability to create my life.”

When someone lives at the effect side, which is also the most popular side in the world today, it sounds a little bit more like this:

“Life is that thing that happens to me. They did this to me. It's not my fault.”

It’s important to note that being “at cause” is not the same as being “to blame.” When you live at effect of things outside you, you give away your power to make changes to get different outcomes. When you recognize how you are at cause, you can make different decisions and create different results in the future.

It really comes down to this… when you look back on your life, do you want to see a list of reasons why you didn't accomplish your dreams? Or do you want to see a list of your desired results?

The definition of empowerment simply is moving from effect to cause in life and operating from a psychology of excellence. Notice that I said the word “excellence” and not “perfection.” That's because we believe that perfection is actually the lowest standard that you can strive for. Perfection is either not attainable at all, or ,even if it is attainable, it's not attainable consistently. So, what we want to encourage you to do here in class is to really strive for excellence, which means that you focus on your own behavior, and work at out-doing your previous best.

It's pretty easy to be a cause for the good things in life… that car, the great relationship, the perfect house etc. But it's possibly even more important to find out how you're at cause for the things that aren't going so great, Because that's where you regain your power to create different results.

With the route it helps to teach your client to operate at cause. When a client comes to you and they're venting about what it is that they're experiencing in their life or how they feel stuck or stagnant or stranded with where they're at, using the route helps them to assess their current situation and helps them to reflect on what route steps or decisions they took to get to where they are now.

More importantly, it also helps them to consider what route steps or decisions they can take to create a different strategy to get to a different destination. This exercise proves that if they could create their current reality, they actually have the power to create a different one using a different set of decisions.

The Wheel Of Life

The next coaching assessment tool is the Wheel of Life. And I love this one so much as an initial coaching assessment because what the Wheel of Life does is it helps your clients to evaluate how content they are with different areas of their life.

 

So the Wheel of Life is a circle and it's broken up into different areas. So sometimes it has six or nine different areas. And this may include spiritual, financial, relationship, vocational, things like that. And what they're doing is they're rating how they feel in these different areas on a scale of one to ten. And then essentially, they kind of color the wheel and they'll see that the wheel is kind of uneven.

 

They may be doing really well in the financial aspect, but maybe really struggling in the relational aspect. So essentially, if they're struggling in different areas and doing really well in different areas, the wheel becomes uneven, meaning that the ride through life will become bumpy. As the coach, what that helps you to do is it helps you to know how to create a more even wheel by focusing on the areas that they're not so impressed with and highlighting the areas that they are. Again, using this in the early stages of meeting with a client helps you to know where to focus. It also can be used as an assessment tool throughout to see how things are progressing, because you may notice that they begin to feel more aligned in certain areas where originally in the beginning of working with you, they weren't

Circle Of Influence

The hardest situations to cope with are the ones that feel out of our control. And so when working with people that feel like they're losing control, using the circle of influence can really help them to come to peace with what it is they're experiencing. So essentially what you're going to do is you're going to draw three concentric circles on a sheet of paper, and each circle is going to speak to a different aspect of their level of control.

So the first circle is what is it that they can control.

 

The second circle is what is it that they can't control but they can influence.

And then the third circle is what is it that they can't control or influence at all- but can work to accept.

This will help you to keep them focused on the things that are within their control so that they can put their energy there and not so much trying to control the things that they don't need to put their energy into. And it helps to really calm and regulate and balance their energy as well, so that they're not putting their focus in the wrong areas.

SMARTER GOALS

The next tool is one that I feel like most people have heard of, which is Smart Goals.

 

But I actually like to create what's called smarter goals. Smarter Goals is an acronym that stands for a specific

measurable

attainable

relevant

time based, and then

evaluate and redo.

I love this strategy so much because so many people approach goals from this standpoint of throwing spaghetti at the wall and waiting to see what sticks. But when you have a smarter goal, you have a process that you can follow, that you can see through. You can tweak as necessary, but you make sure that your goal becomes attainable.

 

This is also a tool that I like to use in the early stages of coaching because it helps me to know what it is that we're going to focus on, and then it gives me something to continue to check in with or assess throughout our time working together. Watch the above video to see how I leverage it in my work. Inside of The ELEVATE Method we take it even deeper and add the NLP approach to SMART Goals and the results with setting goals using this is truly next level. The way I have weaved NLP into my client goal setting sessions has created unparalleled breakthroughs! Its amazing to see the difference.

 

Gratitude

The majority of my coaching sessions begin with gratitude because gratitude is the highest energetic frequency you can vibrate at and when you're in a state of gratitude, you actually put yourself in a position to attract more things to be grateful for. So what I do with my clients is I have them identify five things that they're grateful for, as well as five wins that they've had over the last week. This always starts the sessions super high vibe.

 

In addition this helps them to switch their focus from all the things that they've forgotten about, all of the things that have gone wrong, all the things that they're worried about, and really hone in on the things that are going really well. There are many ways you can incorporate gratitude. You could do it as part of your morning routine, you can have a gratitude journal, a gratitude rock or even a gratitude jar. Also, one of my favorite activities that I've done with majority of my clients is created Gratitude jar. The gratitude jar is awesome because you just buy a little mason jar from your local grocery store or something and you get some colored papers and you cut them up. And then each week you list something that you are grateful for for that week. On New Year's Eve, you go through and then you pull out each of these papers and you say it out loud. This activity will get you feeling so high vibe, so excited, so lit up, because it reminds you what it is that you have to be grateful for. And it showcases how much progress you've made. This is a tradition for my family and I am something I look forward to each year.

Former Self Letter

Finally, the last strategy is the letter. I love having my clients write a letter to their former self, thanking their former self for all of the things that they taught them, thanking their former selves for all the lessons that they learned. I'm a firm believer that everything works together for the good of those who love God, and that's a Bible verse.

 

But I really leverage that within my life. Even the things that we don't understand why they happen to us, even the things that we're resentful of, even the things that we're embarrassed for, have allowed us to become the person that we are today. So when you write this letter to your former self, you one, get to see how much progress you made. You two, get to really be in a state of gratitude for all of the things that you've gone through and all of the things that you've overcome. But three, you also really get to tune in to how powerful and unique you are as a person and understand that everything is working out for your good.

 

Doing this has helped my clients to see that what they perceive as failure has actually been feedback that has allowed them to grow and expand in ways that they never would have been able to without that experience. As you can see, there are so many different coaching strategies, tools and resources that you can have access to that will help you to facilitate amazing shifts and transformations within your coaching session. The goal is to understand your client, understand what it is they need, and then to be able to pull from your toolbox of strategies so that you can support them at facilitating transformation that goes deeper, happens faster, and last longer.

The great news is now you have a bunch of resources that you can access and pull from at any time that will help you to become that standout coach, that powerful coach, that coach that everyone wants to come to, because you are that next level coach. So I challenge you to consider the ways in which you can weave these different tools and practices into your coaching business and watch how things begin to elevate.

 A productive coaching session starts with getting to know your client, asking the right questions, and understanding how you can help them succeed.

As a coach it's important to be able to support your clients on a deeper level by letting them know that you're here to listen and support them on a deep level.

Unfortunately many coaches have the wrong impression of what truly goes into a coaching session. 

Impactful coaching isn't about having all the answer and just talk therapy. It's so much more. 

If you're ready to take your coaching sessions to the next level grab the ELEVATE Your Coaching Sessions Bundle using the first button in my bio:

EYCS is a bundle of coaching tools and step-by-step guidance for coaches. These are all tools I wish someone had given me back when I was struggling to get the wheels in motion!

When you pick up ELEVATE Your Coaching Sessions for just $44, you will get:

✅ A fool-proof formula to build rapport in your sessions

✅ Questions for intake and follow-up sessions

✅ A powerful action plan template for between-session growth

✅ NLP and Time Techniques strategies for creating momentum

✅ A grounding technique and tapping session to use before sessions

✅ A cord-cutting session to clear yourself of your client’s energy after each session

And so much more!

If you're ready to ELEVATE your coaching sessions grab your ELEVATE Your Coaching Sessions Guide: https://www.nicolyawilliams.com/tools-for-coaching-session

If you desire to learn more about The ELEVATE Method and how to take your coaching business to the next level join us here: www.nicolyawilliams.com/elevate