How to run a coaching session from start to finish
I firmly believe that every coach has their own unique approach to coaching, However, most coaching sessions share a common structure and unfold in much the same way. So today we will talk about how you can run a coaching session from start to finish without the overwhelm.
1. Build rapport
A presupposition of NLP says that Resistance in a client is a sign of a lack of rapport. Obviously, as a coach we would like to avoid resistance if possible. This is why it's critical that before any deep work is done that you focus on building rapport. Every good coach knows that diving into deep discussions without first establishing rapport is a sure-fire way to derail the therapeutic process. So let's first talk about what it is and how you can build it.
The dictionary.com definition of rapport is a close and harmonious relationship in which the people or groups concerned understand each other's feelings or ideas and communicate well.
When people are like each other, they tend to like each other. The NLP process of rapport
creates a feeling as if the participants like each other. Rapport is a process of responsiveness and relating to, and not necessarily “liking.”
Rapport is established by matching and mirroring. So you can use gestures, posture, facial expressions, and breathing to build that rapport. (For example: you can match your clients breathing with light finger tapping).
*It's important to know that if you notice resistance at any time in the session you can build more rapport*
Inside of The ELEVATE Your Coaching Sessions Bundle we discuss creative ways to start off your sessions.
2. Listen to your client
Show your client that you're interested in what's coming up for them and in their success. Open-ended, guiding questions lead to more detailed and thoughtful answers, which lead to more productive coaching conversations. Clients learn and grow the most when they uncover the answers themselves.
What most people won't tell you though is that POWERFUL coaching is not about knowing all the answers and giving advice. It’s about listening, asking powerful questions and helping your client to discover the answers they already within themselves. Your job as a coach is to be their guide, their cheerleader and their biggest advocate.
Key point: A foundational tool of NLP is to respect each clients model of the world. Understanding this will change the work you do as a coach tremendously. The truth is that everyone has very different motivations, preferences, and personalities, so if you ask questions to help you understand your clients “why” and where it comes from and what their preferred “how” looks like, then you can adjust your coaching conversations to align the way they work best with the improvements they desire and deserve.
While listening to your client know that it's okay to ask questions. Questions can allow your client to see things from a new perspective and it can help break the hold that their perspective often has on them.
3. Support your client
As a coach I am very big on giving feedback sandwiches when working with clients. I will remind them of an amazing piece of evidence that shows their growth. Then I will share something that will stretch them. This may be something that could be tough for them to receive. I then follow up with another area that they have done phenomenal with. This process often softens the overwhelm that comes with focusing on all of the hard stuff.
To ELEVATE Your Coaching Session it requires a balance of tough feedback and praise. If your coaching conversations are solely focused on what’s not working and that’s not motivating, it’s demoralizing. If on the other hand they are focused on how perfect things are going it will be tough for your client to make much forward progress.
Coaching requires both encouragement and empowerment. So you get to empower them to trust themselves. It's imperative that you as the coach and they as the client trust that they have the answers within them, your job is to help pull it out .
This is where you can weave in your STAND OUT Coach strategy. If you're not familiar with this, let me explain. We were all born with gifts and talents and when you show up as a coach you get to leverage your authenticity in a way that has an amazing impact on your clients. In my FREE What Is Your STAND OUT Coaching Strategy Quiz you will learn your stand out strategy and how you can become the go to coach because of it. Understanding this modality helps you to facilitate change with your client that goes deeper, lasts longer and happens quicker! Take the quiz here!
4. Tasking
Tasking is a way to give your client a take away assignment upon the close out of a session. Here the coach might invite some homework, journaling, or other in-between session activity. I like to include tasking with my sessions because it helps to keep the momentum going even between sessions.
When laying out these next steps they should be mutually agreed upon – so talk together about what is reasonable to expect given their schedule, responsibilities and the complexity of the changes being made.
This level of accountability can make a massive difference in their results. Examples of takeaway assignments I have given to my clients (i.e. an eft video to watch, a meditation to do, a book to read, a post to make, a potential client to follow up with etc.). Tasking is powerful because it shows that transformation does not only have to take place during sessions.
Coaching conversations are meant to yield changes and results, so be sure to clearly define and outline what needs to happen next once the session is over. Also have them identify how they will be accountable to their goal/focus.
5. Close Out
Determine the next best steps (i.e. will you be following up with the client in a week, when is the next session, do they need to rest etc.). I also like to use the concluding of a session for visualization. This is a powerful close out technique to imagine what the client desires and to allow their subconscious mind to hold it and align with it.
Invite your client to envision their desired outcome...
What will that look like, sound or feel like (subjective or objective)?
Where are you now regarding what you wanted to achieve?
What is the next best step you can take that your future self will thank you for in relation w your desire?
How can you hold yourself accountable to this?
Being organized and having a plan will help you feel in control and always know how to conduct a coaching session with confidence. So keep this list of steps handy and trust that the more you practice the more you get to make it your own.
As a coach you have a very powerful role! When people invest in you (time and money) they are trusting you. Therefore it's imperative to make a commitment to improve your own skills and competencies.
If you're ready to learn how to ELEVATE your coaching sessions and take your client transformations to the next level check out this amazing life changing bundle: www.nicolyawilliams.com/tools-for-coaching-session
